Something I need to keep reminding myself mostly about work is to be thankful even in the trying times there is always something that can lift your spirits. Thankfully I have such a great wife to tell my stories of so called horrors at work and together we are able to see a new light. Thats why people get married it is a joint effort at least for us. If it weren't for our great relationship I would have gone postal a long time ago. She is definitely my soul mate and together we will rise to any so called glitch in life.
It is good to see ourselves as others see us. Try as we may, we are never
able to know ourselves fully as we are, especially the evil side of us.
This we can do only if we are not angry with our critics but will take in good
heart whatever they might have to say. Gandhi
April 15, 2011
April 14, 2011
The Times
Today was kind of a rough day for me. Zuri has been grumpy with a cold, and so is quite needy of me, my arms, my attention. I do mostly pretty good at just *being* with her, but when my other sweets need, oh, say... Food! it gets more difficult. And so, because I don't have 'down-time' during the day, here I sit at this crazy hour, reflecting, breathing, being still. (really, though, i should be sleeping, because i woke up with a head-ache and vowed to myself and Zuri that we'd take a nap together today. didn't happen)
Zuri and I went on a short bike ride today, which included a slight hill, so I'll count that as my little work-out. My legs felt like rubber when I was done, so, really, it counts. I was in a better frame of mind after some fresh air and walking around by the pond that we rode to. Zuri was fascinated with all the goose poop, and kept leading me around, pointing it all out to me... "poop", she'd say. Yep. I even let her touch one (it was pretty dried out, so there).
The boys and I watched some Daniel Tosh stand-up stuff. He's a funny one, that Daniel. Of course, some cool conversations came out of that. Also watched American Idol. I'm pulling for Casey Abrams. Zuri was ready for sleep at this point, so we came downstairs and laid together while John and I had a long, great (as usual) conversation over the phone. He's in Torrington, WY, heading home tomorrow. Damn weather better allow his safe travels.
I told John this, and I'll say it here, too: I am in awe and so inspired by the man that he is. I sometimes have to do a double-take and blink my eyes a time or two and remind myself that this is real. This relationship that we have. I love who he is as a human being. And I really, really love that I get to be a part of his journey. Damn lucky, us two. Fo Sho.
After I said goodnight to Johnny Ray, I slid out from under Zuri to go fix the boys a snack and take it upstairs to where they were (corn dogs and clementines). "Oh, awesome, this is so awesome, thanks mom!" says Stone.
Sage came down requesting more clementines, so I sent him back up with a bowl full (peeled). I'm working on my 'food issues' lately. I will trust my children with their food choices, no guilt attached. And that includes no crazy eyes. It's easy to not *say* anything, but most times, our faces say it all, even if we don't utter a word. Well, mine does, anyway. Ask John. So, I've decided that for them to trust me where food is concerned, I first need to trust them and *their* food choices. If all I ever do is shove my agenda down their throats (nice pun, huh?) how will they ever really have space in their thinking that will allow them to simply watch and decide if the way John and I eat interests them, or holds any real value for them.
Well, my teeth are brushed (was going to wash my face, but... nah), the kids have all been checked in with one more time and kissed and told that they are loved. They're set. And I'm off to bed. Sweet dreams...xxoxxo
Zuri and I went on a short bike ride today, which included a slight hill, so I'll count that as my little work-out. My legs felt like rubber when I was done, so, really, it counts. I was in a better frame of mind after some fresh air and walking around by the pond that we rode to. Zuri was fascinated with all the goose poop, and kept leading me around, pointing it all out to me... "poop", she'd say. Yep. I even let her touch one (it was pretty dried out, so there).
The boys and I watched some Daniel Tosh stand-up stuff. He's a funny one, that Daniel. Of course, some cool conversations came out of that. Also watched American Idol. I'm pulling for Casey Abrams. Zuri was ready for sleep at this point, so we came downstairs and laid together while John and I had a long, great (as usual) conversation over the phone. He's in Torrington, WY, heading home tomorrow. Damn weather better allow his safe travels.
I told John this, and I'll say it here, too: I am in awe and so inspired by the man that he is. I sometimes have to do a double-take and blink my eyes a time or two and remind myself that this is real. This relationship that we have. I love who he is as a human being. And I really, really love that I get to be a part of his journey. Damn lucky, us two. Fo Sho.
After I said goodnight to Johnny Ray, I slid out from under Zuri to go fix the boys a snack and take it upstairs to where they were (corn dogs and clementines). "Oh, awesome, this is so awesome, thanks mom!" says Stone.
Sage came down requesting more clementines, so I sent him back up with a bowl full (peeled). I'm working on my 'food issues' lately. I will trust my children with their food choices, no guilt attached. And that includes no crazy eyes. It's easy to not *say* anything, but most times, our faces say it all, even if we don't utter a word. Well, mine does, anyway. Ask John. So, I've decided that for them to trust me where food is concerned, I first need to trust them and *their* food choices. If all I ever do is shove my agenda down their throats (nice pun, huh?) how will they ever really have space in their thinking that will allow them to simply watch and decide if the way John and I eat interests them, or holds any real value for them.
Well, my teeth are brushed (was going to wash my face, but... nah), the kids have all been checked in with one more time and kissed and told that they are loved. They're set. And I'm off to bed. Sweet dreams...xxoxxo
April 12, 2011
Our Day
Zuri is under the weather (i wonder where that saying ever came from?) today, so we hung close to home. We did spend a short bit at the park nearby. Figured some sunshine and fresh air never hurt anyone. She enjoyed herself, too. First time riding the merry-go-round. I was on it with he at first, but then had to get off and have her big brothers hold her on the horse so I wouldn't lose my cookies in front of all the other park-goers.
We spent some time on the trampoline, watched a movie (sage and I), played Xbox w/ friends (Saylor & Stone), watched Netflix thru Xbox live w/ friends (Saylor, Stone), hung clothes on the line (me), watched some Youtube vids (S,S,S), went for a walk with Grandma (Stone, Sage, Zuri, me), practiced some parkour (Stone, Sage), rode a bike (Stone, Sage), took a couple naps (Zuri), ate some frozen blueberries and strawberries, twice (Zuri), made a smoothie, twice (Saylor, me), started a hilarious book (me), played with the dollies (Zuri, me)... --- ... --- and a whole bunch of other stuff that I'm not thinking of now. It's late, afterall.
I caught myself thinking today: "Wow. This is my life? Really? It's ***MY*** life!!!!!" I'm Grateful beyond words for our beautiful life. The simple things bring me so much joy. Just being here to take care of our children in a mindful way heals my heart and makes me whole. Everyday.
We spent some time on the trampoline, watched a movie (sage and I), played Xbox w/ friends (Saylor & Stone), watched Netflix thru Xbox live w/ friends (Saylor, Stone), hung clothes on the line (me), watched some Youtube vids (S,S,S), went for a walk with Grandma (Stone, Sage, Zuri, me), practiced some parkour (Stone, Sage), rode a bike (Stone, Sage), took a couple naps (Zuri), ate some frozen blueberries and strawberries, twice (Zuri), made a smoothie, twice (Saylor, me), started a hilarious book (me), played with the dollies (Zuri, me)... --- ... --- and a whole bunch of other stuff that I'm not thinking of now. It's late, afterall.
I caught myself thinking today: "Wow. This is my life? Really? It's ***MY*** life!!!!!" I'm Grateful beyond words for our beautiful life. The simple things bring me so much joy. Just being here to take care of our children in a mindful way heals my heart and makes me whole. Everyday.
April 6, 2011
Make Time for Play
After I got Zuri nursed down to sleep, I slid (very stealthly... else she'd wake up and search for the boob!) out of bed, got my face washed and teeth brushed, then made up a quick batch of nachos for the boys. I took them upstairs to where they were playing MW2 and hung out with them for a while, watching and learning about how that whole thing works. They're very patient with me, and all my questions. (I am a woman with many, I assure you. Maybe not always a good thing. Or maybe it is.)
Stone was playing on-line with someone who I could hear through his headset. He sounded like a cool kid, and Stone and he were having fun running around showing each other little glitches here and there. And I was enjoying watching. WHAT?!?!? Yep. I was actually watching with pure, un-distracted interest in what they were doing. I think it helped that I could hear the conversation, because then it helped me understand what their goals and objectives were. It was so cool. Even though I don't understand every. little. detail. about their game, I'm there, watching, participating in whatever way I know how. They like that. They want me there. They explain what they're doing, and what this term and that saying means. I'm there for them now so they know that I'll be there for them always. As parents, we can tell our kids that we'll always be there for them or we can simply show them. Actions always speak louder than words.
I attended a drum circle this evening. Another friend of mine attended, too. She said she only came because her daughter wanted to be there, and that she *herself* would never come to something like that because it would be something too close to what her mother would do. She and I went on to have a conversation about the role of being the first born child plays (or, how shitty it is to be the first born). We...er, um, maybe I'll switch to "I" now.... I am always serious. I always have to make sure everyone else is taken care of. I can't have too much fun, because who has time for fun, because I have to be the UBER responsible one, making sure everyone gets home safely or doesn't drown in their own vomit. Play? Nope, sorry, too busy being responsible.
Eck.
I want to PLAY. I want to PLAY. I want to PLAY.
My children remind me to play. To stop with the responsibilities and just Play, right here, right now, before this Now is gone. I'll never regret putting down the 'serious stuff' to have some fun and make memories with my kids. They are, and will remain, my Greatest Teachers.
Stone was playing on-line with someone who I could hear through his headset. He sounded like a cool kid, and Stone and he were having fun running around showing each other little glitches here and there. And I was enjoying watching. WHAT?!?!? Yep. I was actually watching with pure, un-distracted interest in what they were doing. I think it helped that I could hear the conversation, because then it helped me understand what their goals and objectives were. It was so cool. Even though I don't understand every. little. detail. about their game, I'm there, watching, participating in whatever way I know how. They like that. They want me there. They explain what they're doing, and what this term and that saying means. I'm there for them now so they know that I'll be there for them always. As parents, we can tell our kids that we'll always be there for them or we can simply show them. Actions always speak louder than words.
I attended a drum circle this evening. Another friend of mine attended, too. She said she only came because her daughter wanted to be there, and that she *herself* would never come to something like that because it would be something too close to what her mother would do. She and I went on to have a conversation about the role of being the first born child plays (or, how shitty it is to be the first born). We...er, um, maybe I'll switch to "I" now.... I am always serious. I always have to make sure everyone else is taken care of. I can't have too much fun, because who has time for fun, because I have to be the UBER responsible one, making sure everyone gets home safely or doesn't drown in their own vomit. Play? Nope, sorry, too busy being responsible.
Eck.
I want to PLAY. I want to PLAY. I want to PLAY.
My children remind me to play. To stop with the responsibilities and just Play, right here, right now, before this Now is gone. I'll never regret putting down the 'serious stuff' to have some fun and make memories with my kids. They are, and will remain, my Greatest Teachers.
April 4, 2011
March 29, 2011
On Listening
This past Sunday at fellowship, our lay leader shared with us a spoken word essay on life's themes and detachment. It was lovely to listen to. Who doesn't like to be still and listen to a good story? John tells the kids stories all the time, (and I've heard the stories several times) but I sit and listen like it's the first time I've ever heard it.
As I was cleaning up the kitchen today, a thought stumbled into my head: just think of how much we miss out on, because we're too busy talking...or preparing to talk. Listening is big. Today, I will try to be a better listener.
The spoken word essay was from this site :::: ~Listen Well~ From its homepage: "offering once monthly, recorded pieces that speak to our need for individual awakening, and embrace the shared wisdom of all faiths..."
Can't wait to hear more, there are a whole list of archived pieces just calling my name.
As I was cleaning up the kitchen today, a thought stumbled into my head: just think of how much we miss out on, because we're too busy talking...or preparing to talk. Listening is big. Today, I will try to be a better listener.
The spoken word essay was from this site :::: ~Listen Well~ From its homepage: "offering once monthly, recorded pieces that speak to our need for individual awakening, and embrace the shared wisdom of all faiths..."
Can't wait to hear more, there are a whole list of archived pieces just calling my name.
March 26, 2011
Spring is here?
We celebrated the spring equinox last weekend and it was gorgeous. Friday the 18th we spent alone just our tribe of six. On Sat 72 friends came together to bring in the spring with planting seeds, decorating eggs, hunting eggs, Hula Hooping, dancing, drumming, singing, and telling stories. It was so much fun, what great souls. This weekend a bit of snow but I know it will be warming up soon cause I got the call to go back to work. I am excited about the work season this year I feel I have grown so much. My perception of life has changed in many ways, it is hard to put into words. I am very grateful and blessed with such a wonderful life.
Its Saturday 26th we just turned the electricity back on after an hour of drumming and singing by candle light to honor mother earth so nice. Boys hanging with cousin Jarod , Mama in bed with baby girl I think I will join them.
You must be the change you wish to see in the world
Its Saturday 26th we just turned the electricity back on after an hour of drumming and singing by candle light to honor mother earth so nice. Boys hanging with cousin Jarod , Mama in bed with baby girl I think I will join them.
You must be the change you wish to see in the world
Saturday
We're spending the day lazing around, mostly. I"ve spent some time playing around with a free webinar service that we can use for the coop help our members becoming more familiar with our on line ordering procedures and stuff like that>
and now<> or an apostrophe " this is what i get> sHIT!!! And my letters will become upper case for no reason, at random times. shhhh. Don't tell John. Saylor and I just got done 'damaging' (oh! look, it's working now!) John's computer using uTorrent. Evidently, we invited in a nasty little infection. But. Fred (fixmycomputer) fixed her up for us. Next time, we'll just save the $95 and buy the movie we want. :)
John is scheduled to start his first mill job of the season on Monday. However, we now have 2 inches of snow on the ground, so that may get pushed back a bit.
Our life is buzzing right along, ever so sweetly. John and I were just talking about how content we feel right now. It's wonderfully wonderful. I love that we have such real conversations. We're both comfortable with sharing our feelings and that is what makes our relationship so special, I believe.
The other night, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep (on a night when I had to have my alarm set for a wake-up the next morning, so naturally, could NOT fall asleep), I decided to start a blog for each of the children. I wonder if they show up automatically within this little place (like in my profile somewhere?) or perhaps I should link to them here, too?
Ya. That's what I'll do. I'll put them here, and then I'll add them to my sidebar.
John's watching "Thumbs Up", and I'm listening in. Sounds interesting. It's about hitchhiking.
Ok, so John is giving me crap about... "what, now are you going to become a rolling reporter? someday you'll have to actually interact with your kids" -- because I'm giving a play by play here.
I'm gonna go now. Interact with my kids. :)
Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy
and now<> or an apostrophe " this is what i get> sHIT!!! And my letters will become upper case for no reason, at random times. shhhh. Don't tell John. Saylor and I just got done 'damaging' (oh! look, it's working now!) John's computer using uTorrent. Evidently, we invited in a nasty little infection. But. Fred (fixmycomputer) fixed her up for us. Next time, we'll just save the $95 and buy the movie we want. :)
John is scheduled to start his first mill job of the season on Monday. However, we now have 2 inches of snow on the ground, so that may get pushed back a bit.
Our life is buzzing right along, ever so sweetly. John and I were just talking about how content we feel right now. It's wonderfully wonderful. I love that we have such real conversations. We're both comfortable with sharing our feelings and that is what makes our relationship so special, I believe.
The other night, while laying in bed trying to go to sleep (on a night when I had to have my alarm set for a wake-up the next morning, so naturally, could NOT fall asleep), I decided to start a blog for each of the children. I wonder if they show up automatically within this little place (like in my profile somewhere?) or perhaps I should link to them here, too?
Ya. That's what I'll do. I'll put them here, and then I'll add them to my sidebar.
John's watching "Thumbs Up", and I'm listening in. Sounds interesting. It's about hitchhiking.
Ok, so John is giving me crap about... "what, now are you going to become a rolling reporter? someday you'll have to actually interact with your kids" -- because I'm giving a play by play here.
I'm gonna go now. Interact with my kids. :)
Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy
September 22, 2010
Summer Snapshots
A half hour after this photo was taken, we all loaded up to go join the Halo: Reach prelaunch party at Game Stop. Well, Saylor enjoyed the festivities, the rest of us hung out in the car and read Harry Potter. And slept. ;)
Big Daddy on the Rope Swing.
Saylor on the rope swing.
Sunshine Girl.
Hangin' with the friends.
Little moments...
So, these are kind of in 'reverse order', but that's ok. Here, Beautiful Stone turns 9! We had a small gathering of friends join us at Peppy's Pizza where we ate pizza, played games, had some lazer tag fun and gorged on chocolate cake - well, I gorged. I love chocolate cake.
My lovely sister and my sweet baby daughter. Simply kissable, both of 'em!
Max, our old dog. He was brought home about a month before I got pregnant with Saylor. Saylor turns 12 in January. Old dog. Deaf now, but still totally loyal and protective of our babies.
Daddy and Baby Girl.
One of 4, yes, ***4*** visits from Diana and Hayden this summer. I love these people. I believe we're playing a very fun game called "bullshit" here. I highly recommend it.
September 18, 2010
To My Children
I was reading Post Secret today, and this particular post stuck out to me in a big way.
When I think long and hard about the kind of influence I want to have on my children, and the type of relationship I wish for with them, it comes back to this.
I know the feeling of 'guarding' myself when talking to or hanging out with my family. And I feel sorry for them that they don't know me, my authentic, whole, beautiful Self. It's my own fault, I realize this. I wonder how to begin showing them, and wonder, also, why it has to be so hard and scary to be real with people. Baby steps... I know I'll get there.
I work very hard every day practicing acceptance and loving kindness with my children, so they know deep down that they never need to guard themselves with me. They never need to 'omit' part of a story, or feel shameful or embarrassed sharing their thoughts with me, for fear that I will judge them. Each of them has a life of their own, they are on a journey that may or may not reflect bits of my own, and that's ok. It's better than ok. It's the way of the world, whether people want to admit it or not. Some people think they will be successful in controlling their kids to do what they say, when they say, etc. It might work for a while, but I wonder if they stop to think about the damage being done? Do they understand that they are likely missing out on knowing the true essence of that child? What a tragedy. To know oneself is the most important thing we can do for ourselves, yet so many of us have no idea who we really are. I wonder why that is......?!
To my beautiful children, the Lights of my life:
I promise to love you, to accept you, to celebrate life with you no matter what that looks like. I promise not to have that look of disapproval, or that tone in my voice that makes you feel bad or less, I promise to jump right in there with you to share whatever emotion you're sharing with me. I promise to be Grateful for this life that we get to spend *together*, and I can't wait to watch as your life continues to unfold for you.
You amaze me every day. I'm so Glad to be your Mama... <3
When I think long and hard about the kind of influence I want to have on my children, and the type of relationship I wish for with them, it comes back to this.
I know the feeling of 'guarding' myself when talking to or hanging out with my family. And I feel sorry for them that they don't know me, my authentic, whole, beautiful Self. It's my own fault, I realize this. I wonder how to begin showing them, and wonder, also, why it has to be so hard and scary to be real with people. Baby steps... I know I'll get there.
I work very hard every day practicing acceptance and loving kindness with my children, so they know deep down that they never need to guard themselves with me. They never need to 'omit' part of a story, or feel shameful or embarrassed sharing their thoughts with me, for fear that I will judge them. Each of them has a life of their own, they are on a journey that may or may not reflect bits of my own, and that's ok. It's better than ok. It's the way of the world, whether people want to admit it or not. Some people think they will be successful in controlling their kids to do what they say, when they say, etc. It might work for a while, but I wonder if they stop to think about the damage being done? Do they understand that they are likely missing out on knowing the true essence of that child? What a tragedy. To know oneself is the most important thing we can do for ourselves, yet so many of us have no idea who we really are. I wonder why that is......?!
To my beautiful children, the Lights of my life:
I promise to love you, to accept you, to celebrate life with you no matter what that looks like. I promise not to have that look of disapproval, or that tone in my voice that makes you feel bad or less, I promise to jump right in there with you to share whatever emotion you're sharing with me. I promise to be Grateful for this life that we get to spend *together*, and I can't wait to watch as your life continues to unfold for you.
You amaze me every day. I'm so Glad to be your Mama... <3
September 15, 2010
I just gotta be me.
Dang. Damn. Shit. Hell.
ahem...
Ok, it's been a long, long, long time since I made it a priority to WRITE. Writing makes me ~~~feel~~~ better, so, why don't I do it, already!?! Well, do you have a minute? I'll begin to begin my story. Read along if ya like.
A couple of years ago, I was so terribly betrayed by somebody in my family. Read here, if you want the dirt. It's over and done now, but I believe it damaged me a great deal. I think back to the person I was *before betrayal* and who I am now, and I'm different. I don't want to be different, damaged, any more. It's time I reclaim my mojo and get on with it.
I am taking back that part of me that is Confident, Proud, Self-assured, Strong, Fearless, Trusting. I need to move forward as that person. My children need me to move forward as that person. They deserve nothing less than that person.
When I wrote regularly, my life just seemed - - - better. Was my life better because I wrote? Did I write because my life was better? One thing is for sure. I pay more attention when I write. I watch more, I notice more, I'm more present. Weird, I know. I never pretended to be normal.
So, here I am. The Whole of Me. For everyone to read and judge. But, that's their deal. I'm here, as me, doing what I will do, and making no apologies for who I *AM*.
And so... here goes.
ahem...
Ok, it's been a long, long, long time since I made it a priority to WRITE. Writing makes me ~~~feel~~~ better, so, why don't I do it, already!?! Well, do you have a minute? I'll begin to begin my story. Read along if ya like.
A couple of years ago, I was so terribly betrayed by somebody in my family. Read here, if you want the dirt. It's over and done now, but I believe it damaged me a great deal. I think back to the person I was *before betrayal* and who I am now, and I'm different. I don't want to be different, damaged, any more. It's time I reclaim my mojo and get on with it.
I am taking back that part of me that is Confident, Proud, Self-assured, Strong, Fearless, Trusting. I need to move forward as that person. My children need me to move forward as that person. They deserve nothing less than that person.
When I wrote regularly, my life just seemed - - - better. Was my life better because I wrote? Did I write because my life was better? One thing is for sure. I pay more attention when I write. I watch more, I notice more, I'm more present. Weird, I know. I never pretended to be normal.
So, here I am. The Whole of Me. For everyone to read and judge. But, that's their deal. I'm here, as me, doing what I will do, and making no apologies for who I *AM*.
And so... here goes.
June 29, 2010
It's Almost Official
Our new home...
We've been looking all winter. Thinking, asking, discussing, dreaming, wondering, researching.
We thought about country living. Love the idea. It's very romantic, and I like to imagine myself living in the country, but, the reality doesn't jive. So, smack dab in the middle of the city is the place for us, for now. Five minutes to everything. Easy access for all of our traveling friends to swing on in as they pass by.
I'm working 15 hours/week at the Breadroot and John is on the road all the time during this busy season, two more big reasons not to be outside of town.
We're closing end of July. I'm so very ready to be in our own home again.
We've been looking all winter. Thinking, asking, discussing, dreaming, wondering, researching.
We thought about country living. Love the idea. It's very romantic, and I like to imagine myself living in the country, but, the reality doesn't jive. So, smack dab in the middle of the city is the place for us, for now. Five minutes to everything. Easy access for all of our traveling friends to swing on in as they pass by.
I'm working 15 hours/week at the Breadroot and John is on the road all the time during this busy season, two more big reasons not to be outside of town.
We're closing end of July. I'm so very ready to be in our own home again.
February 19, 2010
Just to make you giggle!
A friend came to play recently and forgot to take her wig with her when she left. We had some fun with it.
For Today...
...since that's all we really have.
The boys are snuggled up watching Dino Squad episodes (thank you NetFlix/Watch Instantly option!) and eating fluffy scrambled eggs, made by their mama with a joyful heart. And it feels oh so much better that way. I've been wandering down that evil road lately, you know the one...the one that's got it's own original soundtrack labeled "Old Tapes That Run Through Your Mind and Threaten All That is Possible"... the road, the steps that have the words and phrases running through my head that sound a little like this...(read in your best,
What I continue to learn, and evidently need frequent reminders about, is that I have a choice. Wow! I truly, really, honestly have a CHOICE about how I want to BE, about *who* I want to ****BE**** with my children.
So, I happily scramble up the local, farm fresh brown eggs for my sweet sons. (2 separate batches, because of a late riser). And yes, honey, I would love to help you find something on Netflix to watch. And guess what...I'm instantly rewarded (because who doesn't like rewards...again, yuck, but a whole separate post). Perhaps I should say that I instantly Feeeeel the Love and Gratitude from my boys, and it feels mighty nice. I like this road.
I'd planned to do a couple errands this morning while everyone slept, but decided to wait around to see if anyone would like to join me. Nope. They're good right where they are. So, the girl (presently snoozing in the sling next to my heart...ahhh...) will go and do the necessary running around while the boys get to do exactly what they want to do, too. Gotta love a life that allows for all of our needs to be met!
January 13, 2010
Wednesday, January 13
What wonderful weather we're having here right now. And we deserve it, after graciously accepting the below zero weather that's been the norm for several weeks now. The boys all took the cold snap great. We played lots of Wii and PS2. They hardly touched either all summer long, so they're getting their time in I guess.
Yesterday we went for a long walk on the bike path that's near our house. Zuri slept, I walked (w/ Zuri in the sling), Sage went by bicycle and Stone and Saylor both walked with me. Stone had his airsoft guns along, so we made plenty o stops to shoot various snow banks and water puddles.
Today, we took a short walk to the nearby park and met some friends there. The boys bicycled about a bit, and spent a little time on the playground, though it was pretty darn snowy all around. Still didn't keep my Sagey boy from keeping his shoes on, though. Something about being at the park, the shoes just gotta go for that kid. Stone, too, actually, but he kept his on today.
Saylor turned 11 on Monday. His Golden Birthday. Can't believe my guy is 11 already. I remember the day he was born. I remember vividly having tears in my eyes the day he turned 5, like it was such a milestone. And now, here we are, and he's 11. What happened? Life happened, I guess. He's a wonderful child, though he does like to annoy the piss out of his little brothers, with a special affinity for making Stone squeal any chance he gets. Yes, I know there's something awry, some need that he's trying his best to communicate to me, and I'm trying hard to see/find/understand it. Mostly, I just try to love the pieces out of him. Sure hope that's enough.
Life is good here for all of us. The winter is zooming right past, before we know it spring will be here. For today, I'm just trying to focus on my children and it feels really, really good. I'm Grateful and Loving What Is...
September 22, 2009
...and... She's Back!
Not going to try to play catch up, but sure is nice to be back. After spending most of the summer 'displaced', staying here and there, and then finding a rental which needed much preparation, our life is settling down into a nice little groove.
The boys are all taking classes at the local homeschool cooperative for the next 9 weeks (only 1 day/week, Monday afternoon for 3 hours), we had our first day yesterday and they all did great! I have to admit, I was a little nervous, but I kept manifesting a positive experience, and that's what we all had. A parent is required to stay on-site during the entire time, and help in the classrooms for two of the three hours, so I got to bop in and out of the boys' rooms. It was fun.
The baby belly is coming right along. I'm getting very curious about this little being inside me. You'd think since I've done this 3 times before, the pregnancy thing would be less than exciting, but I gotta tell ya, it's not! I can't keep my hands off my stomach and I want to grab anyone that's nearby every time I feel the baby move so they can feel it, too. The boys are good sports, and always come running when I say, "Ooo, look, baby on the move..." They love seeing it, although sometimes, their response is, "Oh, that's gross, it's like an alien in there". Funny monkeys.
We saw John last week and part of the weekend, then he was off to work again. It looks like he'll make it home this weekend, but we never really make any definite plans unless he's actually driving this way. Things change so quickly for him and his job. We talk and text (well, I text him, he's not so fond of that avenue of communication...yet...!) every day, more than once usually. It's a tricky balance staying 'connected' when you physically are not. It's worth it, though, and something we both take seriously. Marriage can be full of bumps and thumps, but when you're married to your best friend, every single down only brings you to a higher place. Always evolving...
We had a relaxing day at home today, followed by a night-time excursion on the golf course that included lots of running, some wrestling, glow-sticks and a bow and arrow. I was jonesing for a bath, so I hopped in when we got back into the house, and before I knew it, I had 3 joiners. You'd really laugh if you knew the size of this tub. It's on the smaller side of a standard sized tub, but they managed to all find a little corner to tuck themselves into. It was so sweet, really, 5 of us in the tub together. I love that they are so open, my little men. They're the best.
May you cherish every moment... Peace...
The boys are all taking classes at the local homeschool cooperative for the next 9 weeks (only 1 day/week, Monday afternoon for 3 hours), we had our first day yesterday and they all did great! I have to admit, I was a little nervous, but I kept manifesting a positive experience, and that's what we all had. A parent is required to stay on-site during the entire time, and help in the classrooms for two of the three hours, so I got to bop in and out of the boys' rooms. It was fun.
The baby belly is coming right along. I'm getting very curious about this little being inside me. You'd think since I've done this 3 times before, the pregnancy thing would be less than exciting, but I gotta tell ya, it's not! I can't keep my hands off my stomach and I want to grab anyone that's nearby every time I feel the baby move so they can feel it, too. The boys are good sports, and always come running when I say, "Ooo, look, baby on the move..." They love seeing it, although sometimes, their response is, "Oh, that's gross, it's like an alien in there". Funny monkeys.
We saw John last week and part of the weekend, then he was off to work again. It looks like he'll make it home this weekend, but we never really make any definite plans unless he's actually driving this way. Things change so quickly for him and his job. We talk and text (well, I text him, he's not so fond of that avenue of communication...yet...!) every day, more than once usually. It's a tricky balance staying 'connected' when you physically are not. It's worth it, though, and something we both take seriously. Marriage can be full of bumps and thumps, but when you're married to your best friend, every single down only brings you to a higher place. Always evolving...
We had a relaxing day at home today, followed by a night-time excursion on the golf course that included lots of running, some wrestling, glow-sticks and a bow and arrow. I was jonesing for a bath, so I hopped in when we got back into the house, and before I knew it, I had 3 joiners. You'd really laugh if you knew the size of this tub. It's on the smaller side of a standard sized tub, but they managed to all find a little corner to tuck themselves into. It was so sweet, really, 5 of us in the tub together. I love that they are so open, my little men. They're the best.
May you cherish every moment... Peace...
September 9, 2009
August 27, 2009
June 27, 2009
So... You Wanna Know What's Up?
The short of it goes something like this:
We're expecting a baby.
John's working in Minnesota.
The boys and I are 'house-sitting' at a little slice of heaven in the Black Hills.
We're house hunting.
I *need* (want?) a nest, again. Love my community here, my support. Invaluable, especially now.
Still have the bus, though it is (and has been for a long time) for sale.
We'll still travel, not sure how that'll look yet.
The boys are crazy as ever.
I'm regaining my sanity. ;)
The bump is growing slightly and giving me occassional thumps to remind me of the new life growing inside me. Nearly 5 months along now.
I'm still in shock that we are, indeed, having another baby.
The boys are thrilled, thrilled that they'll be having a new baby to love.
I have to laugh at myself for thinking I had it all figured out, all my big plans! What a nice little reminder that I am *so* not in charge!
Hoping your life is just as crazy, wonderful, unpredictable and peaceful as ours!
We're expecting a baby.
John's working in Minnesota.
The boys and I are 'house-sitting' at a little slice of heaven in the Black Hills.
We're house hunting.
I *need* (want?) a nest, again. Love my community here, my support. Invaluable, especially now.
Still have the bus, though it is (and has been for a long time) for sale.
We'll still travel, not sure how that'll look yet.
The boys are crazy as ever.
I'm regaining my sanity. ;)
The bump is growing slightly and giving me occassional thumps to remind me of the new life growing inside me. Nearly 5 months along now.
I'm still in shock that we are, indeed, having another baby.
The boys are thrilled, thrilled that they'll be having a new baby to love.
I have to laugh at myself for thinking I had it all figured out, all my big plans! What a nice little reminder that I am *so* not in charge!
Hoping your life is just as crazy, wonderful, unpredictable and peaceful as ours!
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